I’m
currently savoring a book that was given to me for my birthday by my
son Bobby earlier this month. It’s titled “A New Earth,” and
the author (Eckhart Tolle) made a few astute observations regarding
the role of the ego that I happen to agree with. In a nutshell, Tolle
asserts that many of us spend the majority of our time either
reflecting upon the past or looking towards the future, lost in a sea
of thoughts while seldom being engaged fully in the present. Tolle
also contends that we are greater than the sum total of our thoughts
and experiences. He believes that once we’re aware of the ego, it
is easy to identify when we’re caught up in all it’s glorious
madness, because it has an insatiable appetite for wanting more from
external sources and that it’s never satisfied for long. While I’m
no authority on the subject, I can speak for myself and have found
this to be the case in my life as I’ve struggled for years to break
free from an infinite number of self-limiting thoughts.
A
few days ago, I checked out my Facebook page and noticed that Bobby
was passionately sharing his own thoughts on the subject of this book
that’s he’s also currently reading. Unfortunately, he crossed
over to the dark side while ranting about all the ways his ego
inspired thoughts have sabotaged his own self-esteem and sense of
well being. While I understood that frustration and agreed with many
of his viewpoints, I encouraged my son to also see the positive
function of the ego as well, which is to keep him safe and secure.
I
explained my own observations like this: If
the primary function of the ego is to protect and ensure your
survival, make sure you tell your ego that’s it’s done a great
job, especially without any help from your true authentic self. So
far in your young life, you’ve been trapped in a continuous stream
of thoughts that have manufactured an endless supply of fears and
concerns; a few which may actually be valid. Go on to explain to your
ego that you have finally broken free from some of the mind traps
that have pulled you out of the present and you’re ready to take
charge of your life. Quietly observe each thought and concern that
enters and departs your mind that is being expressed by your ego and
then assure it that you are now committed to becoming a hands-on
owner. Your ego won’t have to continue the struggle of managing
“the shop” in your absence. You are now fully committed to
helping it solve its single greatest concern.
As
my wife Diana and I sorted out and resolved some minor grievances
early this morning, a rare moment of illumination hit me as I shared
this experience with her. I realized that I needed to take my own
advice by asking my poor overworked ego what I could do to take some
of the load off. The primary concern of my ego became very clear in
that instant and it was an ongoing issue I’ve grappled with for
years: the fear of potentially losing my business, having to start
over and take on the great unknown. Almost as quickly as problem
number one revealed itself, this answer followed with effortless
ease: Let go of all
the fearful thoughts and feelings, embrace the present and find joy
in helping as many of your clients improve their lives in any way you
can. Learn from Diana’s example by experiencing the simple joy of
living in the moment.
After
several weeks of pounding the pavement and failing to find a client
who wanted to be on the cover, I decided to send out an email blast
the previous night to my clients in a last ditch effort. A few
minutes after our conversation, one of my newest clients that I
thoroughly enjoy working with, John McCain of Premiere Nutrition
called and reserved the front cover for this month! Even more
amazing; John chose to join a business that helps people like me who
want to lose weight, gain energy and feel as good as possible. With
that said, I’m super excited to help John promote his business
while he helps me get back on the road to enjoying a lighter,
healthier and happier life.
Once
I finally confronted my worst fear and then chose a viable solution,
the fear quickly dissolved and everything fell seamlessly into place.
As a matter of fact, it was a good thing John called me early because
I got two more calls from clients who wanted to book the same cover!
