Three Ways to Exercise your Gratitude Muscle

Gratitude is the very thing that makes life both livable and delightful.

By Mick Ukleja

One of the most important muscles we have is the emotional muscle of gratitude. Because it’s a muscle, how can we exercise it and make it stronger?

Webster defines “contentment” as the choice to be at peace with yourself and at peace with the world around you. Contentment doesn’t lead to apathy. It leads to energy, where you feel more rather than just trying to feel better.

There is a reason why the religions of the world basically say that all there is, is all there is, and all there is, is enough. The ancient scriptures remind us of a contemporary truth—that if we cultivate discontentment instead of contentment, then no matter how much we accumulate or achieve, we will not be fulfilled or happy.

Interestingly enough, science has affirmed this truth. Being thankful leads to:

• Lower stress
• Stronger immune system
• Improved cardiovascular function
• Increased energy
• Less likelihood of depression
• Deeper sleep
• Stronger relationships
• Deeper sense of purpose
• Better coping strategies

Our culture tends to celebrate self-glorification. Therefore, we set aside a day as a reminder to celebrate grateful hearts. Gratitude lifts us above our own demands and broadens our peripheral vision so that we take delight in the gifts surrounding us.

How is this possible when there is so much suffering?

It’s instructive to remember the Massachusetts Pilgrims original harvest celebration was surrounded by disease, death and deprivation. And when Abraham Lincoln gave the proclamation for this national day, it was 1863 in the midst of the worst conflict in American history, the Civil War. Both were marked by extreme suffering.

Gratitude is not a map as much as it is a compass that points us to the realities of numerous blessings. And it broadens our perspective so we can see the source of those blessings.

We will never see a movie full of contented characters living lives of gratitude. Yet it is the very thing that makes life at the same time both livable and delightful.

 David Hume referred to gratitude as a calm passion. It doesn’t have the theatrical potential of anger, hatred, courage or sacrifice. We will never see a movie full of contented characters living lives of gratitude. Yet it is the very thing that makes life at the same time both livable and delightful.

Because it’s so important, what can we do to enhance it? Here are three exercises.

1. Be yourself.

This is a challenge in a world that’s trying to make you like everyone else. I’m not pretty enough, smart enough, talented enough, rich enough. It’s a virus that fouls up our emotional hard drive. It’s the temptation to change so people will like you. Work on being yourself, and the right people will love you. As counterintuitive as it is, it will increase your gratitude and contentment.

2. Live the only place you can… today.

It’s easy for all of us to try to live in another time and place. Some lament about what they could have done or might have become. The past is gone and the future doesn’t exist. Think all you want about the past, but it won’t change a thing. Don’t fantasize about vacation at work. And don’t worry about all the work piling up on vacation. Instead, live today, focusing on all the blessings unfolding before you.

3. Saunter into your day.

The word “saunter” comes from the Middle Ages—saint terre. Everything was considered sainted, including the earth. Therefore, to saunter is to walk on the Earth with reverence for its holiness. The opposite is to “race.” In the fast lane, it’s hard to integrate or go deep. When we take the time to live in the slow lane and reflect on the wonders of life, we surround ourselves with a deeper, more profound experience of contentment. Don’t forget to saunter, i.e. enter your day slowly.

These three tips will help your gratitude muscle become stronger. You will grow in your contentment and attract more success into your life—including grateful people.

Merry Holidays

By Bob Cox

Tis the season to be...torn? Do we greet strangers with a smile and then say “Merry Christmas” or “Happy Holidays”? For many Americans, the answer might be: who cares? While I was growing up in the 20^th Century version of the Wild West (the 60’s and 70’s in southern California), everyone greeted one another in the month of December with “Merry Christmas”. The way I felt about this expression was pretty simple back then: The spirit of the term had everything to do with celebrating the pure joy of the season and little to do with the acknowledgement of a specific religion.

When I was a kid, Christmas was by far the most exciting and joyous time of year. As a matter of fact, you could combine all the other holidays into one, stuff them in a giant box and gift wrap it with tender loving care and it still wouldn’t come close to the thrill of Christmas.

I just loved every little part of it, including the sound of joyous holiday songs, the minty sweet taste of an oversized candy cane, the fresh scent of pine needles in our wood paneled family room and the unbridled ecstasy of all the eye candy, especially the mass quantities of festively wrapped gifts stuffed under our enormously decked out Douglas Fir.

I even got a devious little thrill out of seeing the look of exasperation from my dad, as my mom, three sisters and I laid our new tree at his feet. To say that dad didn’t share our passion would be a gross understatement as he never failed to find a way to make Scrooge and the Grinch look more festive than Tiny Tim from The Christmas Carol, not that other Tiny Tim who tip toed through the tulips!

After a long, dark and chilly evening of spirited and thrilling tree hunting, my mom, my sisters and I would stuff the mighty green beast through the narrow front door, drag it laboriously across the thick olive colored shag carpet in our living room, leaving behind us a gloriously satisfying trail of moist pine needles and tiny twigs. Once we got to the family room, we would proudly prop up the 10 feet of majestic beauty beneath the eight foot cork-lined ceiling. Without uttering a word, dad would simply scowl, shake his head in bewilderment and head off to the garage to retrieve his trusty wooden handsaw.

Upon his return, it would be a festive serenade of swearing and sawing until dad’s contribution to the winter madness was complete and our tree stood tall, wide, proud and naked. From there, our 10 busy little hands handled the business of dressing our treasured new companion with bright lights, shiny bulbs, paper thin silver icicles and a white felt blanket where those brightly wrapped boxes would inevitably lie, quietly torturing and teasing my wild imagination until I was ready to burst.

Then, just when you couldn’t think a fat little doughball of a kid couldn’t get any more excited, think again. Whenever no one was around, I would quietly inspect, caress and then shake each and every one of the dozens upon dozens of presents every day until the big day finally arrived. And when it did, it was a noisy and rambunctious free for all, unlike anything you’ve ever seen, even at the busiest shopping malls at 4am on Black Friday! There was screaming, grabbing, clawing and biting aplenty. It sort of reminded me of a typical family dinner at home.

Now, back to the Great Merry Christmas vs. Happy Holidays Debate. What should you say? We could delve into a deeper and more philosophical conversation by acknowledging the growing diversity of our population and ask each person we meet what greeting they would prefer and honor the true spirit of the season, which includes trivial things like peace on earth, good will towards men and ensuring that every person of every faith and ethnic background feels respected and included. Or we could just split the difference and say Merry Holidays!

A Needle of Hope

By Bob Cox

Ever since his near death motorcycle accident three years ago, our Grandson Zack has suffered daily under a dark cloud of extreme chronic pain. Despite numerous surgeries, doctor’s visits, and a cornucopia of treatments and medications, nothing seemed to give Zack a break from a relentless cycle of pain and misery.

Then a ray of sunshine broke through the gloom when our daughter Shauna mentioned that Zack had finally responded to the ancient health practice of acupuncture. Unfortunately, they couldn’t afford the much needed follow-up treatments. When she got off the phone, my wife Diana turned to me and asked if I knew anyone who could help Zack. I thought for about two seconds and exclaimed, “Yes, Dr. Roc!”

Later that day, I reached out to Dr. Roc Gantt, the owner of the Natural Health Clinic in Carmichael and we put together a comprehensive treatment plan to help get Zack back on his feet. Immediately after the first consultation and treatment, Zack phoned me with unbridled excitement and optimism, “That was amazing. Dr. Roc took the time to really listen to me and he totally understands what I’ve been dealing with. I feel so much better and I can finally think clearly again, so thank you so much for putting this all together!”

While Dr. Roc Gantt is a skilled, experienced and Board Certified Acupuncturist, he also has a number of other natural based treatments to help people that suffer from a wide variety illnesses, diseases and chronic pain. Dr. Roc’s philosophy is simple; he doesn’t treat symptoms or diseases, he treats people.

Aside from being an acupuncturist, Dr. Roc is a Naturalpathic Doctor, a Doctor of Oriental Medicine, a teacher and trainer for N.A.E.T. (Nambudripad Allergy Elimination Technique), a trainer for the Upledger Foundation and cranial-sacral specialist.

I asked Dr. Roc to define N.A.E.T. and cranial sacral treatments and how he uses these options to help his patients. “N.A.E.T. was developed by Dr. Nambudripad and it deals mainly with allergies. She is under the belief that a lot of maladies originate from allergies. Conditions like arthritis, fibromyalgia and asthma are oftentimes caused by allergies to foods and/or the environment. Her technique includes acupuncture for adults and acupressure or laser for children. Basically, we eliminate food and environmental allergens so that the person is no longer sensitive to those things”.

“Cranial-sacral works with the cerebral spinal fluid and the central nervous system, which includes the spinal cord and the brain. Western medicine says that the cranial bones are ossified and don’t move, but Dr. Upledger has concluded that the cranial bones do move and those movements can cause a number of serious health challenges. An accident like a slip and fall may cause cranial bones to slip on top of one another and cause a myriad of problems. The cranial-sacral work is able to put these bones back in their proper position and help a myriad of health issues and especially neurological problems”, explained Dr. Roc.

Dr. Roc believes that the key to helping his patients get better begins by gathering as much information as possible about their health history. He asks each patient to fill out a comprehensive health history questionnaire so that he can create a customized treatment plan that will maximize results.

While Dr. Roc has an extensive knowledge with natural health treatments, the majority of his patients require the use of acupuncture for chronic pain, sinus congestion, headaches and an assortment of other nagging conditions. “A patient came in the other day and she was trembling uncontrollably. She’s was in her 60’s and I did cranial work on her and after one treatment, she didn’t have any more trembling”.

Although each patient is very different, Dr. Roc believes that each person can accelerate their own healing by being proactive and following through with the advice he gives them after each treatment. “Getting an acupuncture treatment is just like working out. If you experience achiness from working out or getting an acupuncture treatment, that’s because of a release of lactic acid. If you take an Epsom salt bath a few hours after that workout or treatment, it helps release the lactic acid buildup in the body and reduces that achiness”. 

For more information see www.DrGantt.com 

Have a Wacky Tacky Christmas

By Bob Cox

Of the 29 birthdays my son Bobby has experienced to date, there’s one that stands out in the bank of my memories. My wife Diana and I wanted to do something really special for his 14^th Birthday, so we threw him a unique surprise party. We rented a limousine to pick him and several of his closest friends up at school. From there, we whisked them off to a nearby skateboard park where they enjoyed their favorite activity. After a few hours of unbridled fun, we headed off to a local restaurant, where pizza, cake and presents awaited our arrival.

I could be wrong, but I think Diana and I had as much fun as Bobby and his friends as we basked in all three phases of that memorable crisp autumn afternoon: the planning, the execution and the memories of that special brief moment in time.

Now imagine picking up your child and several of his/her closest friends from grade-school on a cold and rainy December day. They have no idea where you’re going as you travel along Folsom Boulevard and park your vehicle nearest the building sporting a circular sign with a cute little cartoon chimpanzee that’s sandwiched between the words Wacky and Tacky. Chances are good that right about now, those little hearts beating in the back seat will begin to race with anticipation.

Once inside Wacky Tacky, your gang will be mesmerized by the 24,000 square feet of colorful and exciting play space where kids are actually encouraged to run fast, jump high and holler to their hearts content in this soft and safe space where healthy activity intersects with imagination. Your little ones will surely have a blast climbing up 3 story jungle gyms, gliding down enormous slides and navigating through the mouth of a great white shark, whose teeth are as soft as they are pearly white!

While the weather outside is frightful, the great indoors at Wacky Tacky is so delightful. With plenty of comfortable booths to choose from, you can sit back and enjoy watching your kids do what kids do best…be kids. After a couple hours of wild and crazy mayhem, you gather up the crew and allow the little ones to catch their breath in the cozy new movie theatre and enjoy a cherished Christmas movie or other movie of your choice.

If you hear a few stomachs growling louder than the imaginary creatures in the jungle section, have no fear, the Wacky Tacky Café is here with plenty of tasty menu options to choose from. If you selected one of the spectacular party packages, your entire crew will enjoy pizza, cupcakes, soda or juice with balloons and goodie bags.

Do you want even more great adventure? The Rancho Cordova Wacky Tacky facility now has a brand new, state-of-the-art virtual reality gaming room. You will feel like you’re inside the game itself because they have the most advanced headset on the market. With a platform that moves, you can experience the thrill of flying without ever really leaving the safety of mother earth.

I spoke with Nas Qurraa, the son of the creator of Wacky Tacky the other day to get a better idea about how their two indoor facilities in Rancho Cordova and Roseville have become a local sensation.

Q: How do you describe what Wacky Tacky is?

A: Wacky Tacky is the ultimate place for kids to play and have a party in a fun, clean and safe environment. They’re not sitting around playing video games. Kids are actually running around and playing on jungle gyms, getting good exercise while having loads of fun.

Q: How do adults like your place?

A: They love it! Parents can sit comfortably or go in and play with their kids.

Q: Could you describe the new cinema room?

A: We just opened up a room that has 16-18 chairs and has a very nice projector that plays 4K and 3-D movies. We have movies available or you can bring your own movie.

Q: How did you come up with this idea?

A: It just came out of the wind, honestly. My father and I were talking and we wanted to appeal to adults and children. We can also rent out the room for corporate events, birthday parties and other celebrations.

Q: Wouldn’t this be a great place to have a Christmas party?

A: Yeah, Christmas parties are great. We want to encourage church youth groups and other organizations that have programs that take kids to fun and interesting places to come here.

Q: What are your duties and responsibilities?

A: I work full time and basically help out the family. I make sure our facilities are safe and clean, and I oversee the hiring and training of our employees.

Q: Can you tell us about your new virtual reality game?

A: Yes, it’s in a separate room. We’ve got the best headset on the market and a platform that moves. We have several different games you can play, so if you’re going up in the game, you’ll feel like you’re flying!

Q: How do you like working with your dad?

A: I love it! He’s so smart when it comes to business. I think I’ve learned more from him than from any school or any other person. He’s a nice guy, he’s great to work with and everybody that works with him loves and respects him.

Q: Is there anything else you’d like to mention?

A: This is a fun and safe place to play. We’re family owned, we’re always updating our facility and kids love it. We started out in a tiny little place and now we’re known all over Sacramento. Many people have noticed our business model and want to be part of our success.

For more information about Wacky Tacky’s two exciting locations in Rancho Cordova and Roseville, call (916) 476-3260 or (916) 783-3355. Their website is www.wackytacky.net. Also, be sure to ask them about their rewards program. Become a Wacky Tacky Member and enjoy future savings, special offers and exciting updates via text message.

The Votes are in: Willo Salon is#1!

By Bob Cox

As the owner of three thriving hair salons, one might falsely conclude that Marilyn Sadeq has led a charmed and privileged life. Nothing could be further from the truth. Marilyn has worked her tail off for over 30 years while dedicating her life towards helping her client’s look and feel their best.

When she opened the first Willo Salon (formerly Mane Attractions) in Gold River back in 2007, Marilyn invested a great deal of financial, physical and emotional energy to follow her dream. For several years, she navigated her newly established salon through the longest and worst recession since the Great Depression. If that wasn’t daunting enough, she endured unbearable heartache when her 19 year-old son Keyon passed away. This tragedy followed the loss of her husband Ali 15 years earlier.

Despite these unimaginable losses, Marilyn’s heart has remained strong and full of love and gratitude. While Marilyn has made a major shift in her personal and professional life by working primarily from home, all three salons reflect Marilyn’s warm and kind hearted spirit. I asked Marilyn a few questions the other day and here’s what she had to say.

Q: How did you feel after learning about being voted #1hair salon by Style Magazine?

A: We’ve received many other awards in the past, but this one feels really good because I didn’t put any effort into it. In the past, I used to encourage the entire staff to ask every guest to please go online and vote. So, for our salons to be achieving awards and growing is a pretty big deal because I’ve completely shifted who I am and how I run my companies.

Q: Has the continuous growth and success of your salons surprised you?

A: Yes. We now have over 65 employees and several salon owners have said they don’t know how we’ve done it, because when that kind of tragedy in your life happens, the business usually suffers financially and fear shows up in staff, yet The Willo Family stuck together to keep the Willo brand strong.

Q: What are some other things that set you apart from other salons in town?

A: We’re an eco friendly salon and we want to leave the lowest environmental footprints that we can. Our line of colors are 98% naturally derived and very healthy for your body. Our stylists are Certified Aveda Stylists and Certified Aveda Colorists and they have the best products on the market to work with.

Q: What approach do you take during a new client’s consultation?

A: We have signature consultations and it’s really important for us to get to know who you are and understand your lifestyle to make the best decision for your hair. We take everything into consideration, such as your facial structure, your budget, how often you get your hair done and then make sure that it all fits your lifestyle.

Q: What message do you want to give to all of your clients?

A: I tell quests this all the time: We open our doors every day to make people happy. We could do this just for money, but we don’t. We do it for the pure passion of making a difference in people’s lives.

Q: What kind of culture have you created for Willo Salons?

A: We call ourselves The Willo Family, because we’re known for being kind. We hire the heart at Willo and everything else we can train. Our people just have kind hearts and they love to make a difference in this world, so I think we have a pretty healthy culture.

Q: Does being an eco friendly salon also help you attract kind hearted stylists?

A: Yes. We call our stylists living artists. They’re designers, but they’re mostly living artists as we have a living pallet.

Q: Has your management style changed since you opened your first salon in 1996?

A: Definitely. I have a new perspective since I lost my son. When someone comes to me with an unresolved issue, sometimes I’ll say, “Really, this small and simple issue is creating so much drama?” Most of the time, they will laugh and agree.

Q: What advice would you give people that want to have a healthier and more positive outlook on life?

A: For me, I’m committed to healthy conversations. What I teach people that are having trouble is to find something, whether it’s music or meditation that can help you just take a moment for yourself and breathe. I found some U-Tube videos and used them to help with meditation and find balance, gratitude and love. It really is that simple. If I can find gratitude, everyone can.

Editor’s notes: For more information about Willo Salon, visit their website at willosalon.com.