Raising the Bar of Freedom

By Bob Cox

I was out prospecting for more business one bright and sunny spring day, when I stopped by to visit a former client who was busy cleaning up her property. She seemed completely content as she worked away on the exterior of her home, knocking out several tasks when she turned to me and said, “Sometimes I feel so tired because I have to do everything. When I was growing up, my dad went to work and my mom stayed at home and everyone was happy. I think life was better when men went to work and women stayed at home. I think that men should be the providers…what do you think?"

I didn't say much because I was on another deadline and had empty pages to fill, so I merely nodded and smiled. Even though I didn't comment directly, I actually did have some strong opinions on the subject. For the vast majority of our generation, the Baby Boomers, this was the way we grew up. Most of my friends in school we're raised by two parents, which has become less and less common.

Since 1950, the number of one-parent families has increased substantially. In 1970, about 11 percent of children lived in single-parent homes. Those numbers have more than doubled in the last two generations as approximately 26% of children under the age of 21 in the U.S. today are raised in single-parent environments (U.S. Census Bureau). There are approximately 13.6 million single parents in the United States today and those parents are responsible for raising 21.2 million children.

 

In the famous words of Dr. Phil, how has this been working out for America? So far, not so great. In 1950, 252,615 people were in prison. Just 60 years later, that number has increased over 800% as 2,266,800 adults were incarcerated in prisons and county jails! The United States has the highest documented incarceration rate in the world. At year-end 2009, 743 adults per 100,000 population (0.7% of adults) were incarcerated, according to the U.S. Bureau of Justice Statistics. The population in the United States roughly doubled during this time period (from 150,697,361 to 308,745,538). What does this all mean? The average adult is now four times more likely to be incarcerated than an adult who lived in 1950!

So, can we possibly draw a valid, reliable and comprehensive correlation between the rise in single parent homes and the swelling prison population? While I do believe it would be a gross error in simplicity to conclude that these trends represent a complete and accurate explanation to this complex question while dismissing an infinite number of other uncontrollable variables; on the other hand, one cannot simply ignore these two irrefutable facts.

How do we sort this all out? On paper, it would appear that the generations before us had a better and healthier handle on life. One could make a strong argument by concluding that the children of pervious generations received more quality time with two responsible adults guiding them to healthier choices. But, to the best of my knowledge, life has never been played out on paper, so unless you’re an astronaut, the great game of life will continue to be played out between the earth and sky.

With that said, if we were to examine the single greatest motive that has driven Americans from our humble beginnings could be summed up in one single word: FREEDOM. In the brief history of America, tens of millions of our planet's inhabitants have been drawn to our great nation like moths to the light, with the primary incentive being freedom. America continues to lead the way and ring the bells of freedom and democracy.

Since the 1960's, it seems like we’ve been stuck in an age of adolescence, too knowledgeable and experienced to go back to an age where our freedom was limited by rigidly defined roles of previous generations but not wise enough to limit the collateral damage that’s been done to our internal and external environments. The single greatest change between then and now is the change that has taken place in our homes. The rigid roles that kept woman trapped in the kitchen and men confined to unfulfilling jobs are not a healthy or viable option to go back to. At the same time, we cannot bury our collective heads in the sand and stay the course while filling our prisons and landfills with our unwanted and tarnished treasures.

I believe that the best way to pay homage to the brave soldiers who fought and died for the freedom we enjoy is to live life well and continue to raise the bar of freedom. When our forefathers drafted our constitution, which was a formal proposal of a form of government that was unprecedented in human history, we challenged its legitimacy when our dark skinned brothers and sisters were abducted from their homelands and endured an unimaginable nightmare. Enlightened individuals stood up and challenged this horrifying hypocrisy and we are better off today for it. Less than a century ago, women were denied the right to vote, but enlightened individuals stood united and we are better off today for it. Now is the time to once again rise up, raise the bar of freedom while saying no to our wasteful, throw-away habits.

The path of freedom may always be uncomfortably rocky, but the surest way to pave the road ahead for a smoother ride into the future involves raising the bar of RESPECT as we raise the bar of FREEDOM. We need to show compassion and respect for all living creatures small and large, including our living planet. Let’s do this by ending all the double standards of commanding respect while refusing to share it gracefully. Let us show respect for our elders while also respecting our children. Let’s all pick up the slack by offering the younger generation our words of wisdom, no matter how much they protest (I'm kidding)! Let’s be extremely generous with giving respect, so that we can enjoy the respect that others will eagerly return. Finally, let’s respect ourselves and say no to the foreign invaders, the thoughts that say its okay to hurt ourselves and others by taking things that do not belong to us. Where on earth do we begin? Exactly! Right here on earth, right now. The journey always has and always will begin with the beautiful collaboration between our hearts and our minds, so say no further procrastination and yes to action . . . go for it!

 

How to Sell Your Home Fast

By Joel Perez

If you're in the market to sell your home, chances are you're probably going to be pretty happy. Why? Because inventory levels are at an all time low, which means you will probably get quite a few offers. Even though there's not that much inventory out there, I strongly encourage you to make your house look as attractive as you possibly can in order to get the strongest possible offers. Here are a few simple things you can do that are relatively inexpensive in order to get the best price out of your home and sell it fast!

1. Reduce or Eliminate Clutter: Get rid of any clutter that's in the house. This really helps make the house look more attractive and the rooms often appear larger. A cluttered home makes it more difficult for the buyer to visualize how their furniture and personal items will look in the space. It also helps to remove all the family pictures, because you want buyers to focus more on the house and not your personal items.

2. Keep the Front Yard Clean: Curb appeal is still extremely important in today's market. I've had several experiences where my buyers refused to get out and see a house with poor curb appeal. If you manicure your yard a little bit, it should give potential buyers the all important positive first impression.

3. Paint Your Home in Neutral Colors: The cost to paint your interior or exterior is relatively inexpensive and can really help make your home stand out. Neutral and warmer colors give the buyer a blank canvas to work with and they have a much broader appeal.

If you've had a difficult time selling your home, feel free to contact me at (916) 997-7393. I would be happy to come out and give you an honest professional assessment of what you need to do to make your home sell fast and put more dollars in your pocket.

If you’re looking for a real estate professional, it really behooves you to find somebody that has adapted to these changes in the market. Whether you're buying or selling, choose a realtor that has a lot of strong connections with other realtors in the market. If you're buying, they may be able to help you find a great home before it hits the open market. If you’re selling, a well connected agent can line up lots of potential clients who would love to be in your home.

How would You Like Your Car Cooked?

By Walter Ford

The goal in our shop is to always shoot for 100% customer satisfaction, because if you fall a little short you are still okay. I know I harp on customer service all the time, but I came up with an analogy for our staff that compares the auto repair industry to the restaurant business. I have been in the restaurant business before, so I know how demanding it can be.

I recently had a long conversation with Alex, our service writer. I try to help my staff understand what their role is in the shop and have tried different ways, but it never really sunk in. I realized that I needed to come up with an analogy that they could understand.

I basically told him we need to act as though we were a restaurant. The restaurant business is the hardest business in the world because it’s completely subjective. You can have the cleanest restaurant, the best food and the greatest service, but if there is a little bit of wine running down the glass when you set it down, that could completely ruin your customer’s evening. Even the ambience of background noises and sounds from the street are going to make the difference whether the customer will have a good experience or a bad experience.

I explained to Alex that our business was no different than a restaurant. I said, "Alex, you are just like a waiter. If a customer comes through the front door and say's I want steak and eggs but you write on the board hash browns and potato salad and then hand that back to the chef (the techs), what do you think the customer is going get?

It's very important that “our waiter” not only listens to the customer but writes down what the customer wants and gets it exactly to the letter. When the customer says, “I want steak medium rare, potatoes on the right and all the condiments on the side, the waiter must go back to the kitchen and convey exactly what the customer wants. When our techs are done and they deliver the order back to the front, it is incumbent upon the waiter to check the plate, which means it is incumbent upon our service writer to check that car before it’s delivered to the customer.

If a customer brings in their car and says it pulls to the right, has a slight shimmy and the oil needs to be changed, then when the customer comes in to pick up that car, our service writer is responsible to check to make sure each service has been completed. Same as a waiter needs to assure that the meal is plated and prepared correctly. Our service writer's job is complete quality control, the same as a waiter. If he test drives the car and still feels a shimmy, then he’s not going to call the customer and tell them it's done.

I told our entire shop the same story by saying that you guys are the chefs, so if Alex comes back here and gives you a request and it doesn’t make any sense, you need to say something. Everybody is responsible for quality control and everybody is responsible to the customer for delivering a complete and final product. Then and only then can you deliver the product.

Hey Dad!

by Bobby Cox

Here is the essay you requested and the facebook posts I was talking about. Just some thoughts (healthy ones though ha) If they are of particular interest to you then we can discuss them further.

Something curious has been eating at my brain lately... the concept of "Identity". I have studied it a great deal through classes and on my own time lately, and it's a fascinating subject. Many people know who they are. They have an identity. Those people so confident in themselves that they don't care who they alienate. Whether it's the loudmouth ghetto kids on the bus, hipsters at the coffee shop, snobs at the racquet club... There are all sorts of things and groups to identify with: Specific groups like I mentioned, money and material things, race, country, etc. I have always envied those people so confident in who they are because they don't seem to care what others think of them. They know who they do and do not want to associate with. I have envied them because here I am with no identity to speak of. When I was younger I played basketball and still do, but had/have no interest in becoming a "Jock". I played video games for many years, but one could not classify me as a "nerd". I lifted weights but was far from a "meathead". I worked in a warehouse for 2 years but never bought into being a blue collar laborer. I don't even Identify with being American... After studying Italian language and culture for over a year I could just as easily make my way in Italy, adopt their culture, and be as other Italians are without fearing any loss of identity. I suppose I could be called a chameleon, able to adapt to any environment, but still feeling like somewhat of an outsider because I won't ever truly identify with it. Maybe I have been like this because at my core I knew identification with these things was an illusion... That who I really am can not be classified, cannot be explained through identification, and neither can anyone else. I realize now, it's not that I don't have an identity, it's that I identify with everyone, and everything. Everything here on earth all came from Space and whether it's a human, or a piece of metal, many of the particles which make them are the same. I think many people know this too, but are so caught up in the world of form identification that they are blinded in many ways. I know I was, and still am sometimes. It's very tangible and easy to get caught up in... but I challenge myself everyday to look past the illusion. I challenge my mind, telling it that it doesn't have to identify with anything in particular to feel whole - but that I am whole already. If any of this strikes a chord, then maybe it's time to challenge yourself as well. If not, that's cool too. Thanks for reading
Had an interesting conversation yesterday with my friend and co-worker Ben, (who is a very smart and knowledgeable person), about the condition of our country. I will start by saying that I am very comfortable with my life here and have all the opportunities I could ever imagine, but we couldn't help but notice how our society is feeding more and more to humans greatest dysfunction, the human condition. Government seems to be getting more and more corrupt, only focusing on votes and not on solutions. Many people at the very top will continue to be able to evade taxes and not pay their fair share because they donate so much to political causes, and the people who rely on the government to take care of them will continue to be taken care of because that ensures their vote... All the while the middle class gets hosed and continue to shrink. At the same time, many people believe the solution is to tax the hell out of the rich because they are hoarding their money while others are "suffering". Ben brought it to my attention that this is the same mentality Nazi Germany had toward the Jews because many Jews had a lot of money while the rest of the Germans were getting the shaft stuck with all of the debt from the war and insane inflation. That case is obviously more extreme, but it's all derived from the dysfunctional human condition... The rich continuing to want more and more and stay in power... and the poor being jealous of them for having it. Even if every dollar was taken from the rich, it would only be enough to finance the amount our country spends for 1 month. That's insane. Not that I'm some expert on all things political and sociological, but I think it's clear that changes have to made otherwise our system will collapse. I feel like it's going to take something extreme that will throw everyone in the same boat (like WWII did) to initiate a healing process, but even then, internally people will still be dysfunctional and history is bound to repeat itself. There needs to be a change in consciousness, a disassociation with the human condition as the dominant driving force; an internal change to spark an appropriate external one.

Pluggin In

by Bobby Cox

There I was, laying atop an old and rusted drag on the third floor of ancient Mill 1 at Farmer's Rice Co. in West Sacramento, CA – on the verge of a complete emotional breakdown. My job for the day was to clean all the cobwebs off the equipment and ceiling of a place that is like a modern day dust bowl. My face was hot and moist from sweat; sweat caused from wearing a mask that protected me from breathing in the large quantities of dust. I could barely see out of my safety glasses and my clothes were filthy; an everyday occurrence. My back was in severe pain. Each time I put my left arm down to crawl across the drag it felt like someone was shoving their hand through my chest and out my back. I had hurt it a few days earlier playing basketball and apparently having to crawl on all fours didn't agree with it. I couldn't stand my job. Working in that filth everyday, cleaning things that would be dirty again in a week at most, and having to do it in pain... I just couldn't handle it anymore. In addition to the tangible mess I found myself surrounded by – the emotional anguish and severe depression I felt, were the main sources of my pain; only exacerbated by the environment I had to deal with for over 2 years. The sense of despair was unbearable and I seemingly had no control over my thoughts, thoughts that had a voracious appetite for the the negative and destructive. I couldn't stop thinking about how alone I felt, how I couldn't seem to get out of my own way, and how much of a waste of time life was when I couldn't even live it the way I wanted because I was too afraid of failure. I moved slowly, painfully, down the ladder and off the drag, and trudged towards my supervisor's office where I laid myself off. I walked out of work that day just before 10am break, not feeling any sense of liberation or relief, only numbness. I went home and laid in bed for hours, in and out of sleep, feeling sorry for myself for as long as I was conscious. It was the worst I have ever felt my life, and I didn't know how I could make it better. I wasn't sure if I even wanted to. A sad and hopeless victim is what I had become, who no longer wanted to face life – who would have rather died.

The next few days were emotionally charged and filled with a lot of soul searching. I talked with my parents for hours trying to find answers. I didn't want their sympathy, I legitimately wanted help. My mom suggested I go see a doctor and I really thought about it. I thought to myself, I'm not really that bad, just lost, so talking to a professional could help. I figured they'd probably diagnose me as Bi-Polar with anxiety and prescribe Zoloft or Zanax or something like that which might put me in la-la land and help me escape my thoughts. I never followed through with it though thankfully, as I would prefer never to rely on drugs, prescription or not, to overcome emotional issues. Over the next couple of weeks, I gradually started to feel better and back to my old sarcastic self. I had gone through phases like that before where I would get really depressed for a little while and then snap out of it, but it had never been that bad. Even though I was happy I was feeling better, I knew I hadn't resolved my issues so I was wary about the return of those uncontrollable feelings. Shortly thereafter however, a miracle came in the form of an audiotape called, "The Power of Now", by Eckhart Tolle. It was given to me by a friend who had been in a worse situation than I, and in his words told me, "I've read a lot of books man, but this book – this book is the truth." He had given me a book once before that was quite enlightening, so I trusted his judgment. I had no idea however that what I was about to read, and one particular experience I would have while reading, would change not only my life and virtually rid me of depressive thoughts, but also take me on a spiritual journey unlike anything I'd ever experienced and completely reform my view of the world.

Within five minutes of listening to the audiotape I was captivated. The concepts I was being introduced to were so new to me and relevant to my situation. Tolle's main purpose with this book is to make people aware of and become the watcher of what he calls "The egoic mind.", which is the entity responsible for consuming a person with thought and taking them out of the present moment. In other words, when a person finds themselves zoning out in class thinking about all sorts of random things like what they are going to have for dinner later, or about how annoyed they are with someone because of something they did, that is the egoic mind. When a person starts thinking they have worked hard, so they deserve that piece of chocolate cake, six pack of beer, or whatever they believe will "make" them happy, that is the egoic mind. The egoic mind likes to live in the past and the future and search for continuous external sources to make it happy. Another thing the egoic mind likes is to have an identity. It doesn't care what it is, as long as it can identify with something it ensures it's dominance. Hi, my name is Bobby, I am a student at American River College, unemployed, and suffer from anxiety. Albeit a bit clinical, that might be a typical answer from someone when asked who they are. In actuality however, non of those things actually represent who a person is. They are simply words – titles. Don't tell the egoic mind that though – it needs titles to separate itself from others and make itself unique. The opposing force of the egoic mind is what Tolle refers to as "consciousness". When a person is conscious, they are fully engaged in the present moment and thus dissociate with the egoic mind. When I am conscious, I am no longer Bobby Cox the unemployed student with anxiety issues, I am simply in a state of being. Time seems to stop and I exist only as a lifeform in the universe, unbiased, and unassuming. Everybody has experienced this state of "no mind", or consciousness. Playing an instrument or sport, having a great conversation, sex, designing clothes, or other creative activities are all ways in which people can reach this state, and not surprisingly they are things people enjoy doing. However, an external source is not needed to reach this state. A person could simply be sitting on a park bench doing nothing, taking in whatever the moment presents, and be completely conscious. The beauty of moments like those aside from experiencing life as it is with no expectations, is that stress, anger, depression, and other forms of negative emotional based pain cease to exist. Those were the feelings I was consumed by during that period of despair and the feelings that I feared would come back and haunt me. After being enriched with the knowledge I was learning from the book however, the knowledge that I had to the power to control my thoughts and emotions by becoming the watcher of my egoic mind, I no longer feared that. My true moment of liberation however, the moment I would would find my spiritual essence, was still yet to come.

It was an uneventful Sunday evening in the quiet town of Woodland. My best friend (also one of my roommates) and I were hanging out and feeling a bit bored. A couple nights earlier we had some company over and someone left some weed behind, so naturally we decided to light up. We killed a bowl and then proceeded to see who could come up the most ridiculous way to come onto a dance floor. After about an hour and a half that, Harlem Shaking to dubstep, and cracking one liners, we

decided to retire for the night and headed up to our rooms. Still stoned and not exactly ready for sleep, I put on my head phones and started listening to "The Power of Now". Normally when listening to the audiotape, it was one "ah-ha!" moment after another, but this time, I literally felt like I was reborn; brought from darkness into light. Everything that was being said by Tolle made perfect sense and with my brain in such a creative space, I was able to come up with other conclusions related to what I was listening to, such as the significance of life and death and the fact that everything is connected despite differences in external form. I felt like the universe and I were one – that everything I had experienced in my life culminated to that moment of spiritual awakening. I felt Godlike, completely present, and in an enormous state of peace. I felt briefly, during those moments I was experiencing, that I had plugged in and entered true reality.

I woke up the next day still on a spiritual high. I heard blue jays chirping peacefully outside my slightly cracked window and felt the soothing warmth of the blanket that covered my still tingling body. Every sensation was magnified a hundred times over. I focused on every breath I took, feeling the radiant energy of life circulating throughout me. I never knew that such simple things could make me feel so alive. I rolled out of bed and glided downstairs across the the carpet to pour a bowl of cereal, never feeling as though my feet were touching the floor. I have never had a more flavorful bowl of Raisin Bran than on that day. As I ate, I gazed out the window and realized that I then viewed the world in a way I never had before, as a living being just like myself, so full of life, and with so much to offer. That feeling would last a couple days until the mundane, ritualistic activities that dominate much of human life began to once again take their toll on me, and I would slip back into the world of today, a world consumed by the egoic mind. I wouldn't slip back unchanged though. I realized that no matter what was happening outside of me, I had the power to return to that state of bliss whenever I wanted. Whenever I felt the egoic mind try to take control, I became aware of it and concentrated on being present. A changed man, I was no longer a victim of my thoughts, but becoming a master of them.

Although the egoic mind has been, and continues to be responsible for an enormous amount of insanity in our world due to it's constant wanting for more (despite already having plenty) and desire to disassociate with others and make itself "right", it is also responsible for keeping us alive and therefore necessary. It is our survival instinct after all, preventing us from becoming stagnant and complacent – it's just completely outdated. It is an instinct that was developed for dealing with times of severe hardship, possible lack of food, water, or solid shelter, but we now live in a time where that is no longer the reality for the vast majority of our species. Tolle is convinced that we are either going to make an evolutionary change, (disassociating identification with the egoic mind and the world of form) and become conscious, or we are going to destroy ourselves one way or another. Either way, it's just a part of the cycle of life so it doesn't really matter. You either adapt, or you die. It's always been like that and it always will be no matter how simple or complex the life-form. The knowledge I gained from reading this book and subsequently other books related to it, and the night of spiritual transcendence I had, were a part of my evolution as a person. Without them, I'm convinced that I would still be as attached as ever to my egoic mind – lost in negative thoughts and identifying with them as my truth. Those thoughts still do cross my mind from time to time, but as the watcher of my thoughts, I catch them in the act and put a stop to them. I am in charge now and decide to choose my own thoughts. Thank you egoic mind for keeping me alive all these years, but working all that overtime obviously drove you a little crazy. It's time you took a break from running the show and let the real Slim Shady – I mean Bobby Cox, stand up.

When to Deep Clean

By Dr. Andrade & Dr. Montalvo

How do you know if you need a deep cleaning? This is one of the most popular questions we get at Dynamic Dental.

Q: What’s the difference between a basic cleaning and a deep cleaning?

A: A basic dental cleaning is known as a prophylaxis or prophy for short. For individuals with healthy gums, the American Dental Association recommends getting a prophy every six months. The purpose of a prophy is to remove superficial plaque (bacteria) and hard build up know as tartar (calculus) from teeth and gums. Healthy gums should not bleed nor have pockets that measure more than 4mm. If there are signs of gingivitis (inflamed gums) or periodontal disease (severe gum infection), a prophy is not recommended. Most prophy appointments include a check up exam, x-rays and usually take’s about an hour to complete.

Q: What is a deep cleaning?

A: A deep cleaning is also known as scaling and root planing. It is a procedure done to treat infected gums. This type of cleaning is reserved for patients meeting one or more clinical criteria. 1. Having swollen gums measuring 5mm or more on one or more teeth. 2. Radiographic evidence of tartar below the gums. 3. Radiographic evidence of bone loss. 4. Bleeding gums.

The purpose of this cleaning is to clean and remove debris from the root surface (under the gums) that is causing inflammation and bleeding. This treatment takes more than one appointment and the patient is anesthetized with local anesthesia. This allows the doctor or hygienist to thoroughly clean the teeth and gums in order to reduce bleeding, inflammation and reduce gum measurements.

Q: How do you know if you need a deep cleaning?

A: During your general check up, your dentist or hygienist will measure your gums and make sure they are not bleeding, swollen or measure more then 5mm in depth. So, if you haven't had a basic cleaning in a long time then most likely you will need a deep cleaning to remove the debris that has accumulated around the tooth surface. Taking care of gum bleeding and inflammation is the best way to prevent future tooth loss. It's never too late to get back on track to a healthier smile.